Friendliness & Love

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Friendliness & Love

Friendship is a relationship. One can be in that relationship with a few people. Friendliness is a quality not a relationship. It has nothing to do with anybody else, it is basically our inner quality. One can be friendly even when you are alone. One cannot be in friendship when one is alone - the other is needed - but friendliness is a kind of fragrance. A flower opens in the jungle; nobody passes by - still it is fragrant. It does not matter whether anybody comes to know of it or not, it is its quality. Nobody may ever come to know about it, but that does not matter; it is rejoicing.

Friendship can exist only between one man and another man or at the most between a man and an animal - a horse, a dog. But friendliness can exist even with a rock, with a river, with a mountain, with a cloud, with a far-away star. Friendliness is unlimited because it is not dependent on the other; it is absolutely one’s own flowering.

Love someone and you will feel helpless; hate someone and you can do something. Love someone and you are absolutely helpless - because what can you do? Whatsoever you can do seems insignificant, meaningless; it is never enough. Nothing can be done. And when one feels that nothing can be done, one feels that one is helpless. When one wants to do everything and feels nothing can be done, mind stops. In this helplessness surrender happens. You are empty. That is why love becomes a deep meditation.

Meditation helps in bringing to the surface the friendliness and love in our heart. We learn to love all beings and love becomes our very nature. Loving selflessly, responding to both aggressive as well as passive behaviour of both known and unknown people with friendliness, kindness and compassion, always leaves an indelible mark on the minds of the protagonist.

In our relationship with people, we usually choose to react to words and deeds. If we are in the moment then our action, both in words and deeds is spontaneous and is absolutely appropriate for that particular incident. The more we learn to live in the moment, the greater our sense of unconditional love towards all. 

So, be friendly, just friendly to all that exists. And in that friendliness, you will find all that is worth finding. In friendliness you will find the ultimate friend. Once you find that ultimate friend, love just starts flowing through your being – you yourself become love!


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